On Saturday, team Revolution “ran” it’s first Spartan Sprint.

We Ready- The Crew in the Santa Monica Office Parking Lot
The Spartan Sprint is a 3.5 mile race through the hills (see mountains) of Malibu, replete with 12 obstacles. The use of the phrase “obstacle course,” however, is highly misleading. That implies some sort of corporate ropes course, team-building schtick: trust falls, human knots, all that good stuff. The Spartan Sprint, however, is how REVOLUTION does team-building: like a boss.
So, race specifics: Spartan Village is your first exposure to the phenomenon – there’s live music, guys sitting in tanks of ice, soooo many pull-ups all the time, and the crowd is a mix of half-drowned-looking muddy rat people and people who are still happy with life (i.e. haven’t raced yet).

The Revolution Team! Nice and clean
Our heart began with a howl of pure bloodlust right at 1:30, and a smoke bomb went off – because nothing starts a wretched mountain hike quite like two lungsful of smoke. So our team sprints like crazy toward the first obstacle, which is a moat-like channel of muddy water. This is the point that we stop running and say, “You have to be kidding me” for the first time (this phrase will be repeated multiple times throughout the race). We brace ourselves, fling ourselves into the water, which is frigid, and then scramble up an embankment only to find another murky moat on the other side. Two water pits and a smoke bomb down, only the ENTIRE REST OF THE RACE to go. Yay?
The next thing we hit is a pair of bear crawl nets with a wall to climb over in the middle. Easy. We’re off. Climbing, climbing, climbing, climbing, and we hit a series of over-under-through type walls. Again, fine. At this point, the trail itself is beating us, but we’re starting to feel a little arrogant about the obstacles, and are gearing up for a burpee-free run, since any incomplete obstacle requires 30 burpees before you move on.
We find some ropes dangling down an incline, and use them to keep pushing our way up. We hit an a-frame cargo rope, and then we hit everyone’s favorite obstacle of the course: tire carry, where you pick up a tire, and then run a downhill-uphill oval course with it. It was awesome. Sad times, though, as every child’s nemesis was coming closer: adult monkey bars. But we all made it through, some the traditional way and some by climbing up and scoot over the top…and some via burpee.

Spartan Fashion- Sandy and Bill prep their threads
The next 30 or 45 minutes are a blur: lots of brambles, lots of single track trail, and some of us hiding in the bushes whenever fast people from subsequent heats caught up with us.
Then we hit it – the barbed wire. We have no idea how long this section was – some Spartans said 100 yards – but it felt interminable. We developed three methods for completion: the roll, the scoot, and the frog kick. As you’re crawling under all this barbed wire, which is about 14” off the ground and consists mainly of rocks and mud, the kind course volunteers are spraying you with a fire hose, just in case you were thinking “if only this were muddier…”

Thugs -- Jeremy, Bri and Claudette ready to rock…or not
We get up, and we know we’ve got to be getting close to the end…and then there’s another big expanse of muddy water, followed by a sideways climbing wall, and then another water obstacle – this time a

Spartans prepared to thrash the heck out of us
chin-deep lake of freezing water. Made it through, did more scrambling, and round the corner to the cement bucket lift. We jump and grab the rope as high as we can, sit down, then repeat until the bucket is about 40 feet in the air.
FINALLY, FINALLY…., we round the curve and see the final four obstacles. The javelin throw is first, which, for many, meant 30 burpees. We leap like beautiful gazelles over the pit of fire, and attempt the final 45 degree angle

The rest of her body
wall climb before barreling through the gladiator pit and crossing the beautiful, earth-shatteringly wonderful finish line. After being bestowed with a glorious medal, we get a t-shirt, a chest bump, and a banana (in that order) and stumble around to find the rest of the team.
So, awesome day, awesome company – when’s the next one? (Guys, I hear they’re petitioning for Hawaii – yesssss.)

Spartans at Last

The Moustachio Spartan Clan- An Elite Bunch

We need a shower! Elli and Stacey muddy as ever

14. The Lady Spartans- Erin, Claire, Marisela and Janvika
See video: http://www.spartanrace.tv/?v=malibu Appearances: Claudette, Bill, Ben, Jeremy (maybe more)